Fast Write on Divorce

What are the causes of the high divorce rate in the United States? is my newest topic question for my ten page paper.

In class today, I met with Rachael Heath and she probed me for information on my topic…

Rachael began by asking me, “Why should I care about the high divorce rate?” I answered that 90% of Americans get married and if 50% of those marriages fail, your personal happiness is at stake here, people (Wolfinger)!

Most people see marriage as a way to be close to another person when they crave intimacy and want companionship. The way I see marriage is that marriage is a life time (and beyond) experience that is more than just feel good right now. It pains my heart to see so many couples call it quits because they’ve “fallen out of love.” I don’t believe you can fall out of love, I believe either one, you weren’t ever in love or two, you’ve let time heal your wounds and you’re lying about not being in love anymore.

It surprised me that children of divorce are at least 50% likely to get divorced in their own marriages (Wolfinger). I mean, I assumed that children of divorce would find it more acceptable to get divorced because they’ve seen it done before (and potentially became desensitized to the idea) but 50% or more is astounding to me! (And it should be to you too!)

My main points, so far anyway, are that the divorce rate is so high because of societal shifts, economic changes, and problematic individual circumstances.


4 thoughts on “Fast Write on Divorce

  1. Siarra,

    I love this topic! I rather wish that you would change to a policy question. Something like “What should we do to reverse the trend in divorce?” But it is your essay, and you are the only one to make that decision.
    I appreciate your viewpoint, I was raised to believe that marriage is “forever,” and feel that almost no one believes that today. It has been so refreshing reading your blog, and talking to you on this subject.
    Are you going to address television and video games as possible causes?
    Another possible cause, that you may not have considered is Chemistry. Two pharmaceuticals products that are available today, antibiotics and birth control pills allow for “sex without penalty.” I believe that this also removes some of the guilt that goes along with mulitple partners. Of course, causual sex means that people can achieve some of the physical benefits of marriage without any of the responsibilites. Marriage is much more than that!
    I had not thought about the “fatherless” pregnancies as being an issue. (no pun intended) Again, the benefits without the responsibilities. I don’t mean to criticize those women, your observation has caused me to consider what their actions mean to the rest of us.
    I very much appreciate your views on this and, as you are from a newer generation, you probably are in a better position to consider these questions. If I were writing on this I would probably use the question “Is marriage a thing of the past?”

    Word Count 259

  2. Dear Reseeker! I absolutely love the ideas that you presented for me! You referenced the morning after pill/ plan B which I believe is a reason that a lot of people have sex (because there are suddenly no consequences)!
    I really like your question ideas too.
    ❤ Siarra

  3. I love reading your blog posts they just suck me right in. It surprises me as well that children of divorce are likely to get divorced themselves my mom has been married and divorced twice and is on her way to a third marriage I have seen how this cycle affects her life and It has made me want to make sure that when I do choose to get married that it will be forever in this life and beyond I don’t want to go through the traumatic experience of a divorce. I am curious what the statistic are for people getting married now compared to say 20 years ago it seems like there are a lot more people just living together and not getting married at all because “it’s just a piece of paper”. We talked in class about how more people get married for love now instead of an arrangement type of union it would be interesting to know how people who do get married look at their marriage. Is it an arrangement is it for love is it both? And what kind of relationships work better? I’m sure there’s probably an article or a statistic somewhere but anyways excited to continue reading your blogs good luck on your draft.

    1. Thank you so much for your kind words and thoughts!
      In my research, I’ve found that yes, people are getting married for love now (as opposed to getting married for realistic reasons). People are also claiming that falling out of love, which now happens a lot, is grounds for ending a marriage. I’ve learned that, “Divorce behaviors in the West are a reflection of the redefinition of marriage. More vulnerable and fragile emotional bonds have replaced the economic constraints that once held spouses together” (Encyclopedia of Sociology by Nock and Burke).
      I’ve also learned that many many people are simply cohabitating instead of becoming wed. People don’t have the same morals that they used to.
      Again, thanks for your thoughts!
      ❤ Siarra

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